We’ve sung this song again and again, in Hebrew, English and even Arabic:
“How good it is, how sweet, when siblings come together”
And yet what most of us have never realized is that this song, the opening line of today’s Psalm, contains an important secret. It’s not easy for siblings to get along, and just one Hebrew word in this verse contains the recipe for how to be better at being with each other, whether it’s family, friends, neighbors and humans across borders or across the street.
Tomorrow, the Jewish community will gather for the annual night of atonement. Families and friends, congregants and guests will gather to participate in personal and public prayer.
What is the meaning of together at this time, on this holy day? What does unity or collective mean even if just temporary?
Psalm 133 is the 14th of 15 Psalms of Ascent, and it helps us hold it all together:
שִׁ֥יר הַֽמַּעֲל֗וֹת לְדָ֫וִ֥ד הִנֵּ֣ה מַה־טּ֭וֹב וּמַה־נָּעִ֑ים שֶׁ֖בֶת אַחִ֣ים גַּם־יָֽחַד׃
“A song of ascents. Of David.
How good and how pleasant it is
when kindred dwell together.”
Ps.133:1
‘Kindred’ is the 2023 Gender-Sensitive JPS translation. The Hebrew word ‘Achim’ most often translated literally as ‘brothers’.
Even if the original poet’s intent was focusing on harmony between actual male siblings, many readers over time have sought much deeper ways to make sense of human bonds. And many have paid attention to the one word in Hebrew that is often not translated in English.
It’s the word ‘gam’ which means ‘and’ or ‘Also’: ‘How good it is when kindred gather, also, together.’
What’s the purpose of that added ‘also’ in the verse?
The Zohar has a particularly moving interpretation, which seems especially important during these difficult days:
“Also Together: This refers to the friends who sit together to engage in wisdom, sitting as one, and not leaving each other. At first, when they debate, they seem as men of war, ready to kill each other, yet after some time in conversation and debate, they agree to be with each other with love and fellowship. At that time what does the Holy One, Bless Be, say? ‘How good it is when siblings come, also together.” The ‘also’ included the Shechina - the Divine Feminine, and the divine listens to these friends, as satisfaction and joy emanate.”
It is not always easy to be with family members, or with other people, in harmony and peace. This past year we’ve all experienced rifts and ruptures, difficult conversations and an impossible gap between people we love and the things we believe. And yet, there is a way to lift up ‘also’ - to embody the both/and where people meet despite our differences and focus on what we share in common more than what we don’t.
This is the secret of this verse and the present of this psalm.
It’s good to be together -- especially when it is so much easier to hold on to the grudge and fear and keep our guard up. What happens when we try harder, also, and, together - to extend our hand and heart?
As we enter Yom Kippur, our annual invitation for atonement, I hope that we each take some time to focus on where we’ve not tried hard enough to include the ‘also’ in the ways we interact with our selves and with others. I hope we reach out with tender care to co-create the circles of compassion, where we get to sing and hope and live, better together.
Gmar Chatima Tova. May the days ahead help us all of us be better at creating bonds of unity, and help us heal.
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