What to do with the broken pieces of ourselves, the shards of shame, the fragments of our losses? Mid way through the annual Elul journey to reflect on life and commit to better being, an honest reflection will bring up the baggage that we would rather not face. But here it is, and here we are, both whole and broken. How do we honor it all? How do we heal?
A stunning mythic model shows up again in today’s chapter to remind us that the black box of our being always has room for all the pieces of our past, including the trash.
Down from the mountain, again, Moses is instructed to create a special container for the evidence of his epic rage. It will contain the broken pieces of the first set of commandments, along with the new Torah. Adonai gives clear instructions:
וְאֶכְתֹּב֙ עַל־הַלֻּחֹ֔ת אֶ֨ת־הַדְּבָרִ֔ים אֲשֶׁ֥ר הָי֛וּ עַל־הַלֻּחֹ֥ת הָרִאשֹׁנִ֖ים אֲשֶׁ֣ר שִׁבַּ֑רְתָּ וְשַׂמְתָּ֖ם בָּאָרֽוֹן׃
“ I will inscribe on the tablets the commandments that were on the first tablets that you smashed, and you shall deposit them in the ark.”
Legends have it that throughout the wilderness wandering the ark that carries the Torah can be heard rumbling - the broken pieces rattle on, eternal reminder of how love goes wrong. The metaphor is not only about our personal handling but takes a surprising and beautiful turn in this Talmudic take:
"Rabbi Joseph said: Both the tablets and the broken tablets were placed in the Ark: From here, you can learn that when a Torah scholar forget’s their teaching under duress, they should not be humiliated." Referring to elder scholars who no longer are able to teach, this gentle statement reminds us to honor our teachers, even when they no longer teach us, as they carry both the whole and the broken as sacred reminders of both.
The Talmud takes it further, unto psychological-theological grounds: “Reish Lakish said, "Sometimes the nullification of Torah is its foundation, as is written, 'That you smashed.' God said to Moses, 'You did well by smashing them.'"
Sometimes you have to break things up in order to release what matters. Even Torah has to be challenged, broken, maybe even cancelled - in order for the truth to re-emerge? How much more so for each of one of us, on whatever path we’re on, invited,once a year, to question what is sacred and cherished, and perhaps dare to name what’s no longer working, a perfect fit we’ve grown too big for, ready to be broken, carried with us, as we grow, with time, into our next best self?
The ark is carried through the journey, whole and broken both inside our hearts; the coffin of our past, time capsule and compass, a jigsaw puzzle that perhaps contains the bigger picture?
The Japanese art form of Kintsugi puts the pieces together with golden glue. Todays image by artist @BillieBond honors this tradition.
@Saatchiart
Can We Talk? Want to learn more, discuss your thoughts and feelings about the Book of Words and Below the Bible Belt? Join me this week - on Thursday September 22 2022, 1pm ET - for a one hour conversation on Zoom.
Zoom Meeting:
https://us06web.zoom.us/j/85448738911?pwd=dmRIRndNNDhjaXZsVjh5K3dSYUdLQT09
Below the Bible Belt: 929 chapters, 42 months, daily reflections: Join Rabbi Amichai’s 3+ years interactive online quest to question, queer + re-read between the lines of the entire Hebrew Bible, with daily reflections, weekly videos and monthly learning sessions. January 2022-July 2025
#Deuteronomy #D’vraim #fifthbookoftorah #repair #healourbrokenness #wholeandbroken #Dvarim10 #Kintsugi #brokentablets #arkofcovenant #thetorah #hebrewbible #whowrotethebible? #theartofrepair #Talmud #Menachot #Elul #hebrewmyth #929 #torah #bible #hiddenbible #sefaria #929english #labshul #929project #myth #belowthebiblebelt #postpatriarchy #Saatchiart #billiebond
beloved teacher and fellow traveler - yes! the rattling bones of the patriarch.. his ghost lingers longest.. he bears both the dreams and the broken ones and all the nightmares we'd rather not face.. THANK YOU for reading, seeing, sensing the layers and making the implicit explicit in so many meaningful ways.
Peter Pitzele
I begin to appreciate---late-comer, off-and-onner I am to the journey ---just what artistry goes into these gems. It is the choice of verse and then its explications that are scintillating: what you do with them, the range of interpretation you bring to bear from the Sources, and the way you offer those into our lives. These kind of readings are hardly new to me; in fact they are what I like to do myself with far more limited knowledge, but Amichai, you convey a sincerity that I know rests on your own long, persisting, and often quite private wrestle with your values, demons, and loves.
And here's what came to mind as I read this piece. There is something else that rattles in the caravan, perhaps even in the same rude wagon that bears the ark along, and that is the rattle of the bones of Joseph. Perhaps you reflected on these, my maeven, in a post I missed, but I hear them here...what do they say in Elul as we wait to put on our shrouds?