Slut Shaming, Solomon Style

Prov 7:11-12

Son - beware of her temptation!

Chapter 7 continues the line of ‘straight-forward family values’ that are meant to prevent men from falling prey to  female seduction and all ways that lure one from hometurf loyalties.

Wisdom is depicted here as one’s sister -- safe and familiar, while the women who are not of one’s own family are a general threat. Especially the ones who are sexually active and not silent and demure. That’s where the shaming comes in.

This chapter includes a moralistic story with 5 acts - leading to the young man’s ruin. It is told from the perspective of someone watching the drama unfold from their window -- perhaps the Solomonic palace?

And its’ from this point of view that we get to see what the victim - the young man - does not see, until it is too late. 

It starts at dusk, the magic hour, or late at night. 

An innocent young man, walking home, passes by the marketplace, where the temptation shows up:

וְהִנֵּ֣ה אִ֭שָּׁה לִקְרָאת֑וֹ שִׁ֥ית ז֝וֹנָ֗ה וּנְצֻ֥רַת לֵֽב׃ הֹמִיָּ֣ה הִ֣יא וְסֹרָ֑רֶת בְּ֝בֵיתָ֗הּ לֹא־יִשְׁכְּנ֥וּ רַגְלֶֽיהָ׃

A woman comes toward him

Dressed like a streetwalker, with set purpose.

She is bustling and restive;

She is never at home.

Prov 7:11-12

From here things go south. The woman holds his face and kisses him, and delivers a speech that is six-verses long. The gist of it -- she is a married woman, her husband is away for business, she has set fresh sheets of linen on her bed and invites the boy to make love all night. 

It’s quite an explicit text, giving voice to empowered seduction. 

But from the horrified perspective of the watcher from the window -- this is the young man’s demise. 

She will lead him as an ox is led to slaughter and her ways will lead him down to the chambers of death, costing him his dignity and life.

As an anti-adultery sentiment - this is strong and makes sense. In ancient societies, and in many cases today, young people are wed young, not for love but for procreation, and warning them to stay away from dangerous sexual choices takes every trope society has. 

But from a critical reading, this is biblical slut shaming and a misogynist sentiment that makes women the villains and paints men as the innocent victims of sexual crimes. 

What’s at stake here is the vilification of the sexual and not just the hallowing of family values and monogamous obligations.  

As Stefan Fischer writes:

“The perspective of the warning shapes the argument: it is never the man, but always the woman who seduces, but the man can refuse and withstand. Neither the assignment of equal responsibility or guilt of a man towards a woman is acknowledged,  nor her position in the society after adultery takes place.

..These wisdom teachings create and perpetuate prejudices against women who are not behaving in accordance with social norms. And this is not only the case for promiscuous women, but for foreigners as well. The young man is taught to keep his distance from them. 

This, the book teaches, will protect him and help his community to stay apart and not to intermingle with foreigners. Unfortunately, he misses the enriching and challenging sharing of cross-cultural communication.”

While we in the west have come a long way from the biblical norms of honor killing and what sexuality should or should not look like -- that is hardly the case all over the world -- and even, shockingly, increasingly, among us. 

The popularity of Margaret Atwood’s Handmaid’s Tale is seen by many as a cautionary tale --  these dangerous ideologies are not over and are making a comeback. 

So we read this text today, in the context of this book,  the culture of its creation and the audience it was intended for - with a questioning and critical eye. 

We can look outside our window at voyeurs or pious puritans - or as concerned onlookers not here to judge but with a wish to help out. 

As we look outside our windows at the complicated sexual politics and demands on how we show up in an increasingly sexualized culture - what is the safe space and sweet spot between positive sexuality and unhealthy or immoral lust? 

What will it take to redefine this kind of text to teach all people how to honor boundaries, celebrate eros and prioritize love and respect over fear and restrictions? 

How do we honor women and men and all humans who want to celebrate love making not at the expense of anybody else’s cherished way of life?

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