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The mother here (cf 5:7, D'vorah named "Mother in Yisrael") could be the mother of any and every warrior. She is right to wonder and worry. The bit about the vaginal and material spoils of war is the ineffective effort by her friends to cheer her up. Note that וַתְּיַבֵּ֛ב Vatyabev that Talmud considers "sobbed," occurs just this once in Tanach. Targum Onkelos renders it with a word that describes a kind of thoughtful looking. http://good-to-be-a-jew.blogspot.com/2008/07/dvorah-liberated-woman-ju-45.html

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